What New York Nightlife Is Missing

What happened to the days when nightlife consisted of being well dressed and having your closet friends around you? We don’t have an answer for you either. After the various nightlife articles that we have published and the success that seems to follow each one, we have realized that we are indeed not the sole ones sharing this sentiment.

In this article, we will be taking a different approach to nightlife. Instead of analyzing it and dissecting it, we have decided to point out glaringly obviously flaws in New York nightlife and suggest potential solutions.

Nightlife as we all know it simply does not match its iconic past. Previously, nightlife consisted of elegance, class, exclusivity and natural fun not forced fun. Lately, it has taken a turn for the worse which will lead to its ultimate demise.

The biggest factor that has been lacking is the previous exclusivity of the venues. Previously, access to clubs with celebrity clientele was only allowed access by the elite or well known. Girls that were an 11 on the richter scale were denied entry on certain evenings. Even men offering to spend lavishly on tables were denied as well. This exclusivity built a haughty club persona which made the clients feel special. Those permitted access were loving the exclusivity and the less fortunate kept attempting to enter and enjoy this luxury.

This exclusivity has dissipated. Clubs will let in absolutely anyone nowadays. Just a few weeks ago, we saw a tranny at 1Oak. I don’t care if its fashion week, this is rather peculiar to note at an “exclusive” club. Clubs are now flooded with bridge and tunnelers, promoters, and 18 year old girls running around looking for a sponsor who is willing to feed them Mr. Chow and Nobu.

The bridge and tunnelers deteriorate the aura of the venue with their bridge and tunnel antics. You can clearly tell they are atypical clientele and their presence is distasteful. The promoters further demise any previous reality because along with getting paid to host a table with the cheapest vodka on planet earth, they permit the entrance of some of the most putrid, infantile mannered harlots we have had the misfortune of spotting within our field of vision.

There are maybe 1 or 2 promoters that bring women with any substance with them on a good night. Then you have what we deem “sub-promoters” that have yet to reach the drinking age and usher in vile, simply horrid women. These underage girls have caused us to prefer a screening of The Notebook over an evening on the town. You can most certainly find them drugged out, blacked out, or going home with a stranger which only further taints the aura with tackiness. Worst part of all they have no sense of fashion.

For clubs to survive, it is essential that this exclusivity be promptly restored. Keep the commoner garbage out and the Elite quality in. There is a reason for exclusivity and it is a key component for the longevity of a club.

The second problem is that nightlife is no longer associated with class or elegance, at least by anyone that has it. Sure, the bridge and tunnelers might be impressed by 1Oak and Lavo now, but the Elite are unenthused. While we wish for exclusivity, we also believe people should be respected no matter how wealthy or connected they are.

The lack of respect shown by these clubs is truly absurd. We have heard stories regarding individuals who spend a large some of money at a club and upon returning for a drink are denied. So it makes sense to permit a client not deemed worthy of admission if they pay enough? That is the wrong type of exclusivity my friend.

Just like in any business that sells a good or a service the customer should always be thought of first. Clubs have been treating many with no class at all. What they forget is if you treat people with respect they will reciprocate that by becoming long term clients. It is illogical to allow a client deemed less than wholesome access simply for profit. It is disrespectful to the patrons who expect a particular atmosphere and the individuals who are pillaged for the cash.

If these clubs want to attract high end spenders they are going to need to bring back class and elegance both inside and outside the club. Letting in people who detract from the aura is horrible pr. The waitresses are usually in a horrible mood as well and their service is utterly abysmal. I’d rather serve myself than receive service from these imbeciles and have to tip them gratuitously. When you need something, they are not within reach. However, when they want you to hit your minimum they are inescapable, flashing their A-cups and staring with baggy eyes.

This brings us to our next issue with clubs. They are missing a logical price balance. The last time we checked, we are in a recession comparable to the great depression. There are very few on this planet that can splurge lavishly without flinching. We certainly do not mind paying for a worthy service, but it is truly unfair to charge people a 3,000 minimum for a measly table and toxic smelling couches. It’s even more unfair when the table next to you is getting paid to be there because they are promoters. Bringing this price down to a reasonable number or, even better, providing a quality service will attract more people naturally. There have been instances where we have seen some clubs charge a 20,000 minimum because a popular DJ happens to be there to hit the play button. Clubs in New York are to small to be huge raves thats basic logic.

Why would someone pay 20,000 to see a famous DJ play in New York, when they can pay that same amount on a trip for 7 days to Ibiza and see all of them play at once? Seems like a more rational decision.

The last issue we see in nightlife is the over-saturation of the club market. Every month a new club is opening. Expansion is a good idea, but large scale proliferation should only be left for business that have a hard asset value. Proliferating nightclubs will only lead to massive amounts of debt and confusion of the public. Too many clubs mean the supply is higher than the demand which anyone understanding basic economics can note the problem with. Now you see doormen running after their clients and almost begging them to come to their clubs along with barren venues.

The choices these nightclubs are making are not very rational. We don’t get the point of bridge and tunnel night or urban night and other profit-raising ploys. To the clubs, you sicken us and make us never wish to return. Instead of focusing on cheap ways to keep their balance sheet on point they should worry about how to increase the hospitality of their brand. Many forget that nightlife should entail excellent service and hospitality. People, these clubs aren’t doing you a favor by letting you in. You’re doing them a favor by giving them your business. Another brash decision they make is hiring big time djs to play at their small venues.

Nightlife should provide a great time to people and still hold a high amount of elegance and class. Nightclubs aren’t raves, that’s what Ultra is for. They also shouldn’t be watering holes for 18 year old girls to relieve their stresses. Clubs are meant to attract a good looking crowd that brings in a good energy. Nightlife exclusivity is needed promptly to secure the longevity of New York nightlife. We’re pretty sure many of you agree with us.

Elite.