RIDGECREST, N.C. 5/31/2008 8:47:15 PM
News / Events

Spouses grow, play during Marriage Impact event

Marriage conference helps strengthen relationships

As instructors demonstrated safety harnesses for the physical challenges of the ropes course, Karen Quigg remarked that she felt as if she was a part of the reality show Amazing Race rather than at a marriage conference.

Amazing Race meets Amazing Grace might better describe the Marriage Impact 2008 retreat at
LifeWay Ridgecrest Conference Center in North Carolina. Couples combined outdoor adventure with inner work focused on improving their marriages through biblical principles.

Quigg and husband Chris, of Lynchburg, Va., have been married 18 years and have five children ages 7 to 16.

“I wasn’t sure exactly what we were getting into here,” Karen Quigg laughed. “But I was encouraged that he initiated it. It’s really good to see your spouse doing this. It builds that love and respect.”

To the couples attending the
LifeWay conference, the chance to go whitewater rafting on the French Broad River rapids or take advantage of the abundant outdoor activities in the spectacular region was secondary to the spiritual focus on marriage.

“Marriage is something you have to work at constantly, kind of like a love bank,” said Robert Wood, of Clermont, Fla. He and wife Freddi celebrated their 10th anniversary at the mountaintop retreat. Having taken cruises for their past few anniversaries, the couple was intrigued by the unique combination of Bible study and play.

“It sounded like something that would enrich us and not just be fun,” Freddi Wood said.

“Last year we loved it,” said Kathy Craven of Mebane, N.C. She and husband Ronnie attended the conference in 2007 at the invitation of a friend, and in turn this year invited two couples to come along with them.

“But this is what we were looking for – something that directs us how we can grow in our marriage. All the subjects – financial, sexual, time – you can kind of get in a standstill,” Kathy Craven said of Bible studies led by Dan Seaborn, founder of
Winning At Home, Inc., a biblically based marriage improvement organization in Michigan.

Seaborn, who coauthored The Necessary Nine, with Peter Newhouse, led the couples on a fast-paced and entertaining examination of nine marital principles, including financial security, physical attraction and building “spiritual fusion.”

“One of the reasons it goes out is because of our differences. The world calls them irreconcilable differences. We try to ‘win’ and the whole time we think we’re winning, we’re snuffing it out,” Seaborn said, using a candle analogy.

Seaborn challenged couples to rekindle that flame and step out of their comfort zones not just in their outdoor adventures, but for spiritual growth and intimacy.

Starting off one morning with a hilarious game of laser tag, doing military crawls through the camouflage of twisted wild rhododendron was one thing, said Kathy Craven. But her fear of heights had her skeptical about the high ropes course and zip line on the other side of campus.

Knowing the weekend was about facing overwhelming challenges and trusting God, she decided to at least give it a try. For several minutes she stood hesitantly, tethered to the tree-top zip line perch. Those who watched quietly in suspense gave a resounding cheer as she raced by, suspended overhead.

A little dazed but smiling, “I said, ‘God, be with me,’ right before I stepped off,” Kathy Craven said.

“I’m really proud of you,” said Ronnie Craven, still awed that his wife of 22 years overcame her debilitating fear of heights without a safety net. “It really is a leap of faith.”

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