Brattleboro, Vermont 9/17/2010 11:19:44 PM
News / Business

The Incredible Ending - An Email Marketing Tale of Terror, Pt 4


I gazed at the shadow of the beast, catching a flash of the eastern rising moon reflecting from his reddish glowing eyes. I was totally defenseless, my mind racing with thoughts of how I might escape this impossible situation. If this truly was the mystical creature from the tales and legends of generations past, I was certainly no match for it's speed, agility and brute strength. The local old men's stories haunted me - about the maimed remains found of the victims of this infamous predator of death they had named "The Wateree River Wampus Cat."

Maybe I could just remain frozen and he would eventually run off. My legs trembled as I was gripped with fear, my heart racing even faster. Maybe I could make a run for it - If I could get closer to the house and holler loud enough, someone could come to my rescue before the savage totally ripped me to shreds. I don't know, I just had to do something. But then, my time for thinking was up.

The Wampus Cat began a long, deep, howling growl like I'd never heard, and as the moonlight now hit his clinched, ferocious teeth, I knew this was it. With adrenalin pumping, I quickly turned and bolted toward the house. I hadn't made it two steps when my right foot hit a root, tripping me up. As I fell forward, the cat pounced, again bellowing the same evil scream that had lured me into his strike zone to begin with. He hit me square in the back, shoving me face-first into the rock-hard trunk of an oak tree.  

I was knocked out cold.

That was obviously a good thing, because when I came to some 10 to 15 minutes later, the beast was gone and I lived to tell about it. I was completely unscathed except for some missing flesh over a big knot on my forehead. The only explanation I have of why I wasn't mauled and mangled, is that somebody upstairs was looking out for me. I'll say this - the next time I hear some old timer tell some weird story about an unexplainable, unproven event, I'll think twice before I laugh him off as a crazy old nut job. That's my story, and I'm stickin' to it.

Amazingly Effective Email Marketing Tip #5 - You've got to have a great ending to your story. Any good email marketing writer worth his salt knows you can't have a lame story ending. It can do irreparable damage to your email marketing strategy. On the other hand, a great ending brings your readers great joy and will build customer loyalty. If fact, they'll be looking for the next awesome tale of adventure or wit from their favorite email marketing writer, meaning they'll also be checking out your next product or service offer as well.

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Oh, and by the way, let me tell you how this all changed my life - more often than not, whenever I venture out into the wooded areas of my property anymore, I take a couple of buddies with me. Mr. Smith, and Mr. Wesson.

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