Talking to Children About a Parent’s Substance Abuse

Addiction doesn't just affect the individual with a substance abuse problem. Loved ones are impacted, too. It’s especially hard when there are children who are affected by a parent’s drug use. Almost as difficult is finding a way to talk to your children about your addiction.

Children in Substance Abuse Homes Blame Themselves

Children living in homes where there is parental substance abuse can find life difficult, unpredictable and confusing. Sometimes they even believe the alcohol or drug abuse is their fault, according to the National Association for Children of Alcoholics. Often they feel abandoned due to the emotional unavailability of their parents. It’s important to be honest with children, while also making sure you share information in an age-appropriate way. A five-year-old can’t handle the same amount of information as a teen may want to hear.

Here are truths you can communicate to anyone:

·Addiction Is a Disease – Explain to kids that their parent is sick, but that doesn’t make them a "bad" person.

· It's Not Your Fault – It’s common for children to blame themselves when a parent uses drugs or drinks too much, that’s why it’s important to reassure them that they did nothing to cause their parent’s addiction and they are not responsible for fixing it.

· You Are Not Alone – It’s easy to feel alone in this situation, but there are many other kids who have been where they are now.

· It's Okay to Talk – Addiction can be isolating because it often leads to secrets that are harmful to family life. In order to begin the healing process, children need to know they can talk about the problem, discussing their feelings honestly.

· Learn the “Seven Cs” - The National Association for Children of Alcoholics suggests that children dealing with family addiction learn what they call the Seven Cs of Addiction: I didn't Cause it. I can't Cure it. I can't Control it. I can Care for myself by Communicating my feelings, making healthy Choices and Celebrating myself. 

Substance Abuse Treatment

If you or someone you love is battling an addiction or co-occurring disorder, call La Paloma at our toll-free number. Someone is there to take your call 24 hours a day and answer any questions you have about treatment, financing or insurance.