The Six Signs You've Found A Freak

On the lifelong quest to find the future mother of your children, there are a slew of pitfalls every man must avoid. One of the most tragic situations that could potentially arise is investing your time, money and emotion into a less-than-wholesome woman. A freak, to be frank.

Here are the six signs that your girl is a freak:

6. She dances like she’s a stripper from a T-Pain music video

You take her out for a night on the town. Of course, you’re not trying to marry this girl – you’re trying to get in her pants. That’s always the objective, isn’t it? Right. So, you’re out with her and you notice that she’s abnormally better at dancing than the majority of the female gender. The movement is in her hips, and the look on her face tells you that she’s done this every time she’s gone out. But don’t be oblivious to the fact that she’s just as good in bed as she is on the dance floor.

The fact that every move she’s doing can be found in the confines of the mind of a mainstream hip-hop video choreographer… – well, there’s a high chance that you might have a freak on your hands. And, to be honest, if you’re messing with her you aren’t too innocent, either.

5. The speed that the stilettos come off

It seems to happen unconsciously for some women. Before she even asks where the bathroom is, the shoes are off. Be ready, use protection, and be Elite. Again, consider broadening your horizons to a women you can bring home to mom.

4.  She says, “I don’t do this kind of thing,” and/or, “I’m not a whore”

Freaks just want to be comfortable, let’s face it. Although they’re completely okay with spitting on it or adding an extra body to the equation, the girl you’re about to have a wild night will want you to remain ignorant of how she truly is. If she doesn’t lie, you’ll consider her a whore. She’ll sugarcoat the whole situation and have selective memory about her past sexual encounters.

She won’t tell you that she sleeps around probably twice as much as you do. She’ll also tell you that this is a rare occasion. “I’ve never done this before” is the biggest lie known to man, and a clear red flag. Don’t believe it. It’s part of her plan. You, my friend, are with a freak-in-disguise.

3. Forget the sex… she spits on your dick

She’s clearly not afraid to amuse you with her questionable talent and that, my friends, is one main sign of a freak. But not just any kind of freak – she’s one of the best, an experienced freak. This is where is gets complicated because she’s border-lining the whore region. However, if you’re on the hunt for a freak, you might not care what society labels her as.

You’re getting yours, and she’s getting hers. If you’re trying to get down and dirty, there’s a limited pool of women you can choose from. Be smart, men.

2. Safe sex? No chance…

“Do you have a condom?” This question has always been either the start of a great night or the end of one. If the question isn’t even asked to begin with, then be ready. This is a clear red flag that may make you want to run off into the hills. Freaks most likely enjoy sex more than you, so she’s over that condom phase of her life. Nonetheless, we’d recommend that you wrap it up. You certainly weren’t the first to explore the territory.

1. Ass to mouth followed by an attempted kiss on the lips

Bitch, are you crazy? Properly use the Heisman technique in order to avoid the kiss and keep it moving.

Elite Daily